This Season is Serious

I am in an unapologetic season. I am no longer apologizing for my identity and how I protect my peace. That means setting boundaries. Worrying about others is a part of my makeup, and I care very deeply for those I love, but I've realized that you can't give what you aren't getting from people. You can't make them see things your way, and sometimes, you have to love them from a distance. You don’t love them any less, but maybe ideals don’t align, and that’s okay.

To a degree, conditional love is necessary. We all have conditions. You must know your values, and the benefits of a relationship should outweigh the costs. Sometimes, that relationship shifts into a conditional love contingent on specific actions or certain stipulations. You're left wondering if that relationship is worth keeping. I think it depends on what you feel are acceptable conditions. Maybe it just means you accept the relationship for what it is, set boundaries, and move on. Perhaps it means you continue the relationship, voice your feelings, and hope it improves. However, I'm not sure voicing how that person made you feel will change anything if the person is manipulative or doesn't take accountability. Maybe it means that the relationship should end altogether. This applies to romantic relationships, friendships, and family.

I feel like I've stated in every post that I am not perfect. I'm working through a lot of things. Working through my life changes means accepting things for what they are, praying, forgiving, and moving on. I am looking at myself, reflecting, and giving people grace, but giving grace doesn't mean accepting mistreatment.

My mental health and my peace are top priorities to me, so letting go and letting God is where I'm living right now. There isn't anything selfish about protecting your peace, no matter what that looks and feels like to others; I've learned this recently.

Sometimes, people use the term “protecting my peace” as an excuse not to take accountability for their actions. I think that's a cop-out. It would be best if you still took ownership of your part. My peace is personal. I'm digging deep to place what's important to me into perspective. I can't dictate how people will accept or respond to my boundaries, but I must respect them.

People are just people; the more I understand this, the more straightforward things become. It just is what it is. I like to think that people show up the best they can, but I'm learning that my expectations of others don't have to be their expectations of themselves, and they don't owe me anything.

I've become very selective about who and what I give my energy to, and I'm not playing about myself. This season is extremely serious, and I must show up.

How are you all showing up for yourselves?

LLL 😘